


Sweaters & Photographs

by slight_Ichatrina_obsessed_sleepyfangirl



Category: Sleepy Hollow (TV)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Friendship, Loss, Memories, Post-Finale
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-24
Updated: 2015-02-24
Packaged: 2018-03-15 00:07:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,052
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3430538
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/slight_Ichatrina_obsessed_sleepyfangirl/pseuds/slight_Ichatrina_obsessed_sleepyfangirl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ichabod struggles over the fresh loss of his beloved wife with the help of his dearest friend. Post season two finale.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Sweaters & Photographs

**Author's Note:**

> In the wake of the finale that tore my emotions to pieces last night, I wrote this small one shot. It's not much, but just a few of my thoughts.

There was a moment of disbelief, pure and consuming disbelief. It could have been a horrible dream, one he wished to flee from at all cost. But, then, her gasp had reached his ears and he knew it was true, even as his hand filled with an all too familiar wet warmth. Slight panic filled him as he began sliding to the floor, her in his arms. Stretched out awkwardly, he pulled her close to him, taking in her wide eyes as she stared up at him in shock.

Those beautiful green eyes were still at the forefront of his mind as he sat upon the floor, his back to the bed he had shared with her, their bed. His mind attempted to wrap around what had happened, when it had all gone wrong. When had he lost her?

Fingers tangled in the soft sweater she had worn only days before, he brought it to his face, burying himself in her scent. If only he could keep that small part of her, that small, seemingly insignificant thing, but he knew even that would soon be gone from him. Soon, he'd have little left of his love, but long ago memories of when their love had been all that mattered. When their love had been what had pushed them through to the next day. Back in their time, their future had seemed so bright, so full of possibilities. There had been so many things they'd wanted, discussed in the dark of night, their warm bodies tangled around each other, clinging to their too few moments of peace in each other's arms.

"Crane."

Not looking up, he shook his head, unable to bring himself to speak just yet. The day before, when the worst day of his life had come to pass, he'd thought he could push it to the side. He'd forced himself to stand, to walk from that torment filled room. His Leftenant had stayed at his side the entire evening, her quiet strength guiding him, giving him what it took to make it to the next step. She was the only string he had left to keep him bound to the world, to sanity. But, then, night had fallen and her eyes had finally shut in exhaustion from her journey, her journey to save him. After a time of watching the flames of the hearth dance in the darkness, the quiet of the night had become too much, too suffocating.

Out of the corner of his eye, he noticed her boots come into view and then she was lowering herself to sit beside him, her shoulder resting against his, her warmth immediately easing his breathing. She didn't speak, for which he was grateful. Somehow, she always seemed to know just what he needed. He often wondered if that was some sort of power she had, the ability to sense one's mood and approach it accordingly. It made her a formidable woman and ally. However, those thoughts had to be pushed aside, for they were only a means to distract himself from the feeling of despair that had spread to every corner of his being. Eyes on the soft material clutched in his hands, he croaked out, "My love."

Abbie's body gave a slight jerk beside him, clearly having not expected him to speak. "What?"

Struggling to suck in a breath through his stuffed nose, he elaborated, "That day so long ago...when she told me she loved me for the first time, I didn't-I didn't answer her."

A moment passed before she asked, "You left her hanging like that?"

Mouth twitching slightly at her humor filled voice, he shrugged, "I was too occupied with myself to give a proper response." Rubbing a thumb along one of the buttons of the sweater, he smiled, "She took me by such surprise, a trait she was always very skilled at. I never knew what she would say next."

"When did you finally tell her?"

Eyes falling closed, he recalled her red hair pulled up to expose her pale flesh, her green eyes boring into him with so much sincerity. "Abraham rejoined us, causing my heart to jump into my throat. Guilt steadily began to consume me, completely taking over my thoughts, but then... I saw her eyes focused on my boots in such disappointment. It was as if I'd pulled all the joy right out of her with my lack of reciprocation." Gaze refocusing on the button, a button she'd touched, that had likely brushed her skin numerous times, he swallowed down the knot in his throat. "Abraham began leading her past me and I could bear it no longer. I stepped forward so my hand brushed hers, my fingers placing the slightest pressure to her slender ones. I must have shocked her as her head immediately whirled toward me, her green eyes finding mine. Then, I whispered, 'My love', to her so soft that I'm not even sure I made an actual sound." A smile creased his face. "But she knew. She knew my love was true, that it was as intense and real as hers. The smile that lit her face..." He shook his head at the sweet memory. "I'll never forget that smile for as long as I live."

The room was so still, the only sounds his cracked breathing in the otherwise silence. For a moment, he felt himself tense at how weak he was being in the presence of another, but then Abbie's hand was on his arm and he remembered who he was speaking with, who was here with him, and a calm warmth washed over him.

"I, uhm...I have something for you, but I'm not sure if now is the right time."

The slight nervousness in her voice finally pulled his gaze to find her pulling something from a bag beside her.

"But, then again, when is anything ever the right time with us?"

Despite the urge to curl himself into a ball and weep, he couldn't help his chuckle and nod of approval to such a truth.

She cleared her throat and handed him a thin, black book that wasn't much bigger than his hand. "I had Jenny get this. After...after what happened...I found Katr- _her_ phone and well..."

With a frown and a bit of curiosity, he opened the small book and felt his throat close off again. It was her. An actual photograph of his love. Finger lifting and resting against the smooth surface, he traced the outline of her pale face. She wasn't smiling as it was clearly an accident that she'd taken the photograph. It was slightly out of focus and nearly too close, but it was her. His Katrina.

"I know it's not great, but..." her voice trailed off for a moment before she reached across him to grasp the page. "I got one off my phone, too."

When she'd turned the flimsy page, he felt his heart constrict at the sight that greeted him. "When...?"

Her small shrug bumped into his side. "Not long after she moved into the cabin with you that first time. I dropped by and found the two of you asleep on the couch. Normally, I wouldn't have, but I couldn't help myself. It was kinda cute. Two odd little colonial people."

Vision blurring, he nodded, but couldn't bring himself to speak. It had been a rare moment what with all the underlying tension between them, but she'd fallen asleep whilst leaning against him as he attempted to explain the idea of the mobile device he'd presented her with. He'd drawn both laughter and incredulity from her until late into the night at the sights and sounds he'd shown her. When he'd noticed she was asleep, a moment of uncertainty had clung to him, but then he'd realized how completely natural it felt to pull her against his chest as he'd leaned back. She'd mumbled his name beneath her breath, her soft body resting half along his chest, half along his side as her arms wrapped around him. With a smile, he recalled how hesitantly he'd brought his fingers to stroke through her long red hair, how soft it had felt beneath his fingertips. While she'd slept, it was almost as if they'd had their own spell to return them to a long ago past time. A time where they'd cherished every moment they'd been blessed enough to spend together. Now, tracing his finger over the photograph, he took in how simple they looked, how at peace, the natural way their bodies molded into one another.

"I know you have that handy memory and everything, but I just thought...you know."

Overcome with emotion, he clutched the book and without thinking about it turned to throw his arms around her, wrapping himself against her small form. The sob that left him was absorbed by her hair as he clung to her as though she were the last light in all the world.

"Ok," she whispered soothingly, arms coming to rest along his back. "I've got you, Crane. I've got you."

"She left me," he croaked through his gasps for air. "My love..."

Abbie's hands began rubbing small circles along his back as she held him tightly, every so often whispering his name and her presence. How much time passed of him clinging to her was unknown to him, but eventually, his breathing eased enough for him to suck in a full, not so burning breath. Cleaning his throat, he pulled back and resumed his original place against the bed.

"Forgive me, Leftenant," he said, adjusting himself with the book and sweater back in his hands, a slight embarrassment warming his cheeks.

"Hey," she whispered, to which he couldn't bring himself to look up to in response. After a moment, she nudged his arm. "Hey, you."

With a sigh, he glanced to her out of the corner of his eye and found her looking at him with a raised eyebrow. She looked as though she were about to reprimand his apology, but instead said, "Jenny brought some food. I uh," she smiled and tilted her head tot the door, "I'm pretty sure it's donut holes."

In spite of himself, his mouth twitched in a smile. "Oh?"

"Yeah," she said, pushing herself up and holding out her hand. "Better get em fast if you don't want her to consume them without you."

Nodding, he glanced to the door before returning his gaze to her hand, the hand connected to his dearest friend whom was his greatest tether to reality. When he accepted it, he acknowledged the fact that he was accepting more than just her offer of sustenance, but also her offer of life, of reason to continue on. "I suppose we best not leave her be any longer, then." When she had him on his feet, he released a heavy breath. "May I have one moment more?"

With a soft smile and squeeze of his hand, she backed away and headed for the door. Once she was out of sight, he gave a hard swallow as his eyes fell back to the items in his hand. Tenderly wrapping the small book in the sweater, he lifted it to his face and took in one last breath of her scent before he turned to place it upon his pillow where he ran his fingers over it. "Until we meet again, my love."

Stepping back, he turned to the door where soft laughter was seeping through. Another deep breath filled his lungs as he wiped a hand down his face in an attempt to remove all evidence of his past hours upon hours of thoughts and dwellings. He knew the tears and torment would return in the dark of the coming night, but that could not be helped, nor did he wish it to. There was a time to wrap himself in the memory of his love, but life continued on. It had to. Moving toward the sweet sounds of the sisters, whom he cherished more deeply than he ever would have imagined, he considered that, for now, his place was here...in this time...with his remaining family. That thought in mind, he exited the room, the warmth of his future bright in his mind.


End file.
